In this post, you’ll learn about the 14 things that actually help severe anxiety as Emma talks to her friend, Rachel about her experience with a severe anxiety disorder.
Rachael struggled with anxiety and depression, insomnia, and appetite changes for years. But she continued to learn and grow, to try various treatments until she finally found some things that worked for her anxiety.
All The Things She Tried
Rachel: [00:00:00] I’ve tried EMDR, ketamine, CBD oil, energy healing, dozens of medications, I’ve had about half a dozen therapists, neurofeedback. I’ve been in two inpatient programs that were like a rehab for people with mental health issues. I’ve been hospitalized. I had shock therapy, and I was like, I can’t believe they even do that anymore.
I felt hopeless that I wasn’t ever going to get better, that this couldn’t be cured, that none of these things had worked. I was always going to be miserable, make my family miserable. And then just some of these things gave me a little glimpse of light so that I could be like, oh, that went well. I wonder if that could happen again.
Emma – Studio Mic: This is my friend, Rachel Galvez. She and I have known each other for a couple of years and she’s never been a client of mine. We met in the neighborhood and we volunteered together. One of the things I’ve seen is that four years ago, seemed like you had some anxiety, but you were functioning pretty well.
And then a couple of years ago, what I noticed was I would [00:01:00] see you at church and you would just be pacing, like you couldn’t sit still and you were shaking. You just looked like you were in so much distress. What were the low points like for you or how did anxiety impact your ability to function? And then we’re going to talk about how you’ve come out of that darkest space into a better space.
Rachel: Yeah. So I wrote down, cause I’m not going to remember everything. I just turned 50, so I made notes. Anyway, I would say that I did mention extreme insomnia. In fact, I’ve had like more than a month at a time where I felt I did not sleep at all and I couldn’t even nap in the day. It was insane. I thought I was going to die.
Yeah. Finally came out of that with the help of some meds, but I had a very poor appetite. So, there have been times also at least a month or longer where it’s not just I’m not hungry. Like I would sit there in front of the food and want to throw up. Like, it almost felt like an eating disorder or something.
I really was forcing myself to eat and I lost [00:02:00] a ton of weight and everybody was worried about me. So that came from anxiety. I lost my personality and that’s what we hadn’t even noticed. Like I lost all of my confidence.
Emma – Studio Mic: Because you were such like, you’re an outgoing person. You’re an extrovert, right?
Rachel: Yeah.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah. You’re good with people. You’ve got a lot of ideas. You have a lot of things. And I did, I noticed that you had a really hard time being yourself.
Rachel: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I also lost the ability to enjoy anything, so I couldn’t concentrate on it. I love reading and I couldn’t concentrate on reading. I used to like church and I liked going out and visiting people and doing things and all of it made me nervous.
Loss of concentration. So I could watch a movie with my family, but I couldn’t really, like you said, hold still for the whole thing or was not enjoying it. Memory loss. That’s just continuing those that might be my age and then fatigue, but not being able to relax. So being on this high state of nerves is exhausting.
But it didn’t translate to my mind being quiet and being able to shut down and rest. So anyway, and I have this
Emma – Studio Mic: That must have been so exhausting, like just so exhausting.
Rachel: Yeah. And I [00:03:00] had this off and on for a couple of years. And then just really quickly, just for fun, you want to hear all the things I tried that most of them worked for a little bit, but it didn’t last.
So I don’t want to say that people should never try these things. I just want to brag about all the things I tried.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah. Cause you’re the kind of person who’s not just going to sit back and let life happen to you. You’re going to try stuff. You’re going to try and learn stuff and figure things out. So you tried a bunch of stuff. Let’s hear it. I want to hear it.
Rachel: Okay. So I already mentioned the dozens of medications. I’ve had about half a dozen therapists, which have all been wonderful, but just different times in my life and I would drop therapy and then pick it up again. I’ve tried EMDR, ketamine, CBD oil, energy healing both in person and through the phone.
Tried neurofeedback. I’ve been in two inpatient programs that were like a rehab for people with mental health issues. I’ve been hospitalized and for a couple months and while I was there, I had shock therapy and I was like, I can’t believe they even do that anymore.
Emma – Studio Mic: Who knew? Was it TMS, like transcranial magnetic stimulation or ECT where they’re actually
Rachel: It’s the ECT.
Emma – Studio Mic: You did ECT?
Rachel: Yeah. They actually put you to sleep so you [00:04:00] don’t feel anything and then they do some shock to your body. Creepy.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah.
Rachel: Anyway, I’ve also heard that might be part of why I do have a lot of memory loss from that time period that messes your mind up.
Emma – Studio Mic: That is one of the more common side effects of ECT.
Rachel: Apparently, it did calm me down because I was able to get out of the hospital and come out on a bunch of meds. But I’ve read probably a dozen books about mental health and some of which did help me. My family and friends have been giving me blessings and prayers for a really long time that my faith was a part of it.
But it’s oh, but it’s not fixing anything. I’ve had exposure therapy to try to deal with the things that I’m anxious about. And I’ve done an intensive outpatient program at home, online, and tons of guided meditation.
Emma – Studio Mic: Tons. Yeah. Yeah. Okay.
Rachel: Again, all just like a temporary fix, so I could calm down when I’m listening to a guided medication. But I would just want to listen to another one and not get up and get back to life. So it was just a crutch for sure.
Emma – Studio Mic: Did you find yourself getting to a place where you withdrew from life?
1. Say Yes to Life
Rachel: I mostly kept doing the things and being miserable. So I would say to just, to start off my description of how I’ve [00:05:00] gotten better, I would say a couple things. The first one is I learned how to say yes to my life.
Emma – Studio Mic: You told me a little bit about this. I’m so interested in hearing more.
2. Mantra "Get out of Bed Get out of your Head"
Rachel: And then the other main thing is, it’s a mantra, but it’s get out of my bed and get out of my head.
Emma – Studio Mic: Okay.
Rachel: Those two things have been a huge struggle for me.
Emma – Studio Mic: So would you find yourself laying in bed for hours, just feeling anxious about the day and worrying or what was going on?
Rachel: Yeah. I came back from the hospital on a lot of meds that made me calm, but sleepy. And so everyone was like, yeah, she needs extra rest. And so I got in this habit of just staying in bed as long as I felt like it, and it’s the weirdest thing, because you, at least for me, don’t want to get out of bed, don’t feel ready, I just roll over, but then the longer you do it, the more you feel miserable and guilty, and it was just such a catch 22.
Emma – Studio Mic: So the longer you laid in bed, the worse you felt, and then you’d be, like, less motivated to get out of bed, basically.
3. Get Support
Rachel: Yeah, and then when I did get out of bed, my worries would hit me like, how are you going to get the stuff done that you wanted to do today? Cause you only have two hours now, that kind of thing.
So it actually made things difficult to function [00:06:00] normally. It does like humans aren’t meant to sleep all day. So that one, the way I actually started making progress on that is my mom started being really concerned about that lifestyle and she started calling me at 9 a. m. once a day, and for so long, I would get up and get that phone call and I would go back to bed. I just still was not getting a handle on it. Finally, I was like, okay, I’m gonna make this effort to be sitting here in the Lazy Boy chair by the time the phone call comes out of it, sit here, stay here. I’m not going to have that phone call in bed. So that was like the first baby step to getting out of bed by nine.
And then one time I was like, what if I just, what if I took a shower before her phone call? I don’t even know what made me think about it, but I did that. And man, I just felt like a champion. I took a shower before 9 a.m., and this is so silly to people that get up early, but yeah. So that, and then the next step was as the weather got warmer, I’ve started to getting out with my dog on a walk in the morning. So I do a walk before I talk to her. I would say the biggest thing is to get me out walking. [00:07:00] I’ve never been a regular walker or exerciser. And I do walk him every day, once or twice a day. It’s been good for my body and my mind to get out. And I know you’ve talked about that a lot before too, about getting outside is really critical.
4. Walk Outside in the Morning
Emma – Studio Mic: Was it always really hard for you to exercise or move your body?
Rachel: I just wasn’t motivated.
Emma – Studio Mic: Not your thing.
Rachel: Not my thing. I’ve never been sporty or anything.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah. That’s cool though, the dog helped in that one small way. Okay, so you were having a hard time getting out of bed. You’re having a hard time even getting yourself up and moving. You started sitting in a chair. Your mom started calling you. You started sitting in a chair when your mom called you. You started trying to take a shower before your mom called you. Eventually you got a dog, which didn’t help at first. Then you started walking in the mornings. Now you’re able to function a little better in the mornings. Was this part of your process? Cause you mentioned like saying yes to things.
5. Say Yes to Life- Even if you don't feel like it
Rachel: I think this is the beginning of it. Saying yes to the morning and being like, okay, I can do this. This is a part of life that most people have already figured out how to accept. And I can accept the morning. And then I do not know where I read this. Some article in some magazine that I was reading [00:08:00] where the person said, I tried to say yes, as much as I can. And I just laughed. I was like, that’s silly. That’s ridiculous. Who would do that? I, and I realized that I say no a lot and sometimes it’s literally, no, I will not do that. And most of the time it’s, I’ll do this kicking and screaming and complaining. So I’ve just been a really big complainer, really negative thinker. And but I was like, what if I said yes more often. What would that be like? And so I just started exploring that. And for example, I will complain about the seasons changing because I have to get out different clothes. I’ve done it all my kids are growing up. Oh, it’s spring. Now, I have to find new clothes for the kids. I just love to complain about things. Anyway, just trying to accept the season changes. And then also I’m at this point of turning 50 and getting older. There’s a lot of things that I don’t like about what’s going on in my body. And then I’m worried I’m getting older. But it’s like, what if I actually just say yes to that and just see where it takes me.
Emma – Studio Mic: That’s so cool.
6. Defusion Phrases
Rachel: Yeah. And it’s hard. Then for example, like this, I was nervous about this. I didn’t really want to do it, but I had already told myself you’re a yes man now. So you can say yes to this. And I just said it [00:09:00] and it’s not easy, but it’s still good. Actually, this is what I’m afraid of a lot. And it’s not that I won’t be able to do it or that I’ll, I’m just afraid that I’ll be unhappy and I’ll make someone else unhappy and that’s just a natural fear we have of things that are coming up . Is this gonna ruin my life happiness. It’s just being afraid to try new things. Another thing that was a big game changer for me was something that my therapist gave me and it was, it’s from ACT for Acceptance and Commitment Theory. She gave me a worksheet that has what’s called diffusion phrases. And so I knew you would explain this before, but so the fusion is your mind is really tight and really believing all your thoughts.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah.
Rachel: And defusion is a way to stand back and actually choose if you want to go in the direction of that thought or not. So the idea between these defusion phrases is to acknowledge your mind and notice that you’re worrying and then go on with what’s going on in your life right now.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah.
Rachel: So I would be like, so I’m getting ready this morning and I start to be like, the thought says, “Oh man, I don’t want to get on camera. I don’t know. [00:10:00] I’m going to look. What if I stumble over my words?” My mind will say that stuff to me. And I say, “Hello, mind. I can see that you’re worrying, but I’m going to get back to having breakfast right now.”
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah.
Rachel: And so you just redirect to what you’re doing right there. So I can be going on a walk, but my mind will start, it’ll start worrying about something really stupid. Like somebody’s yard is unkempt. And I’ll be like, oh, this neighborhood is going downhill on a thank you line for your perspective, but I think everybody has their own way, just but you have to be careful not to turn it into an argument with your mind. I’ve known before that I’m a pessimist and would wish to think more positively. But what you’re not supposed to do is in the moment of that bad thought, you’re not really supposed to get in an argument with yourself, right? So if i’m nervous about this, I actually don’t say but it’s going to be good because this and this you just say you’ve made a commitment and you’re doing this. In the meantime, let’s get ready because the thing if you do get in an argument with your mind, I don’t know why but it’s ineffective.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah.
Rachel: So of those phrases my favorite one would just be the one hey mine I noticed you’re wearing a lot right now or I noticed that you’re good at [00:11:00] finding problems today, but let’s just move on. And then one of the other big ones on there says, Here’s the blank story again.
Emma – Studio Mic: Oh yeah.
Rachel: We just need to see what’s going to happen. The stories for me are like, I can’t do this. This is too hard. Or I should go back to bed. Okay. Cause that actually, I didn’t mention, but that struggle, I think, even though I would get better in my mornings, my mind still wants me to go back to bed to feel safe and rest. So for me, it’s like a drug.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah.
Rachel: No joke. I’m sure that when I first lay down, I get a rush of whatever it is, oxytocin or something.
Emma – Studio Mic: Some happy chemical.
Rachel: Yeah. And I’m like, Oh yeah, [inaudible] resting. I’m safe. And the next thing I know I’m worrying and feeling guilty again. So anyway, very much like a drug for me. So my mind would just even give me that story. You can’t do this. You need to go back to bed.
Emma – Studio Mic: So that’s really interesting. I like that paper that you sent me and I’m going to share it with my audience.
Rachel: Yeah. I think that was one of the biggest changes that started happening in my mind was just giving myself permission to drop the worry without necessarily having to know what’s going to happen.
Emma – Studio Mic: [00:12:00] Yeah.
Rachel: Especially on big things. How can you drop the worry of my parents are getting older and one of them is going to die someday. It’s true. But you do not have to spend your time thinking about that. And if you do spend your time thinking about that, you can’t enjoy the time that you have with them.
And you can’t just say, everything’s gonna work out right, nothing bad’s gonna happen. What you can say is, we’ll wait and see. And that is another thing where my faith comes into play, because on the big things, I can barely believe that I’m gonna be okay when one of my parents dies. That’s really hard for me to grasp. But I believe that God can see me through it.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah.
7. Schedule your Worry Time and Write it Out
Rachel: Because I know that I’ve seen him do that for other people in their lives. So I’ve watched your videos for years and I will sometimes take a note or do this or that. I would say like the thing that I do now that I probably learned from your videos was writing some different ways of writing out. I remember you saying, never worry in your head, put on paper. And so I’ve done two different kinds of writing. One of them is a worry write up, and I learned this also from Nick Wignall, who [00:13:00] you had also did a video with him. That’s how I found out about him and I follow his newsletter called The Friendly Mind.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah, Nick’s great.
Rachel: Yeah, anyways, and I did a class on your website by him called Worry Free. And I did do that and it made a big difference for me I was like all of a sudden I was just doing great for a month. Still had some setbacks and that was one of the things that I realized yeah, I know that helped me then how did I get back in this place and maybe life is ups and downs and it’s not a cure There’s nothing that’s gonna turn me back to exactly who I was when I was 30.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah
8. Writing Exercise Wins, Wishes, Whats
Rachel: Just, you know, fearless me, whatever. That’s not necessarily how that works, but anyway, the scheduled worry is where you sit down once a day and you’ve just, I just fill up one page of junk that’s in my mind. And so that way it is still normal to worry and it is okay to have a time and a place for it, which I just do after I get out of the shower every morning, I don’t like to start first thing in the morning, that’s like real downer, but after I’m feeling pretty good and I’m about ready to get to the part of my day that I have some control ovover. Anyways, that’s when I hashed that [00:14:00] out really quick. And then the other one is I came up with this writing at night. I call it Wins, Wishes, and What. And these are all things you’ve told me to write about before, but I’ve got all in one paper now. So I write about a paragraph of wins and that’s things that I’m proud of I did that day.
Emma – Studio Mic: Cool.
Rachel: And that’s so helpful to increase your self esteem and your gratitude. And I do everything. Guys, I couldn’t eat for a while. Yeah. So, I write down the meals I ate.
Emma – Studio Mic: That’s so cool.
Rachel: How I ate breakfast, had lunch. I write down what time I got up. I write down any little things I accomplished. And so I write that about a paragraph of that at night. And then my wishes paragraph is how I want tomorrow to look. And that actually helped me a lot too, when I was starting to change my mornings. So I would write my wishes are get up at eight. Like that goal was written down what I plan to do the next day.
Emma – Studio Mic: Cool.
Rachel: Walk with the dog, talk to mom, have breakfast. Also, it helps to have a little bit of a routine when you’re trying to change something, you don’t want to just wake up and say, oh, what should I do next? Oh, and then after that, what should I do? Oh, what should I do? So it’s good to have a routine for me. But I also have to learn [00:15:00] because I get very rigid in my routines, that if something has to change, then it’s still going to be okay. I don’t want to be like, if I didn’t do my writing today, I’m going to have a panic attack.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah.
8.2 Gratitude Practice
Rachel: No. It doesn’t have to be like that, but I do think that the daily habits make a difference. So, the third thing that I write about at night is what and the what stands for what I’m grateful for. So I just wanted three W’s because it’d be cool. So it’s wins, wishes, and what, and I end up usually having a couple of lines left on my page to write what I’m grateful for. And doing that every day, it’s so interesting because you just think about weird stuff. You can look around and be like, I’m grateful for my refrigerator, my microwave, I just try to be a little creative with it and it really opens my mind to the things that I have. And gratitude helps a lot.
Emma – Studio Mic: That’s really cool. I like that practice, that daily practice. Wins, wishes, and wants. Yeah. Cool. Love it. I just have to say, one of the signs, like, when someone comes to therapy and they bring a notebook, that is a sign that they’re gonna progress in some way, they are gonna learn something and they are gonna grow. I love that you’re referring to your notebook.
9. Use a Notebook to Record What You're Learning
Rachel: Yeah, I have favorite quotes in here about mental health. I’ve [00:16:00] had these thoughts for a long time where they weren’t working for me yet but now that I’m finally making progress. I’m like, hey, this is real. It actually worked.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah, interesting how some things click after a while. Like, I hated affirmations for like my entire 39 years of my life and last year last January I started being able to use like affirmations in like a way that I could believe them. In the past I could never really believe them. They just didn’t sink. They didn’t resonate with me. And now I’m like, oh I can say nice things about myself and it feels good, isn’t that crazy?
Rachel: Yeah I also really love that quote, when the student is ready, the teacher will appear. Sometimes I think about why couldn’t I have done this before? What will I do when this happens, when I feel down again? But I feel like I’ve learned enough that there is some things within my grasp that I can do to make better. It’s not all about just a chemical in my head that’s messed up. That could be a thing too, but, and you’ve always talked about that, how we can change our brain through our behavior and our thoughts. And anyway, so I really, it just took a long time for me to find some of the things that I could [00:17:00] actually change for myself.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah.
10. Mindfulness
Rachel: Two more things I wanted to say about from Nick. He also, the other main thing he has you do besides the scheduled worry, but also he recommends doing mindfulness practice.
Emma – Studio Mic: Oh yeah.
Rachel: And his theory is that you start with five minutes and then go 10 and 15. Don’t worry. Emma. I can’t do 30 minutes. I did it once. I followed his program to the letter the first time.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah.
Rachel: I have not given up the mindfulness practice, but I only do it five minutes a day.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah.
Rachel: I did it 10 for a while. And even though I was starting to fall asleep, cause I was starting to get more comfortable and calm in my life. And so 10 minutes with my eyes closed is not even going to work. But I do five minutes. And I think the thing that’s really important about the way he does the mindfulness is all he wants you to do is sit there and breathe and try to pay attention to your breath. And then every time a thought comes in, just be like, oh, that’s interesting. Back to the breath. Tension training. But I haven’t gotten any better at it. I swear, but I am still all over the place, but I’m guessing that is helping me build that muscle that takes my, when I say to my mind, okay, that’s an [00:18:00] interesting worry, but we’re going to do this right now.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah.
Rachel: I think it’s building that same muscle. And so it probably helps a lot.
Emma – Studio Mic: That makes a lot of sense.
Rachel: And then the other thing I’ve done a little bit different. I think I learned it from a book or my therapist or something is I actually get my body grounded first. So when I first sit down, I just wiggle my toes and my fingers and my butt. I just feel myself in the chair, close my eyes, and then do a listen. I just listen what’s all the little noises around me, and then I start going to my breath. And you just, you don’t have to breathe special. You try to concentrate on how it feels in your body, how it sounds, how it, anything you can to get your mind on just breathing. Anyway, so five minutes, as long as I can do.
Emma – Studio Mic: That’s still impressive. I still struggle so much with mindfulness. Like I believe in it and I, it’s hard for me.
Rachel: Yeah, me too. I don’t enjoy it at all. And I don’t do it every day. It’s one of the things that I most easily drop if I’m busy doing something else, but I haven’t wanted to give it up altogether because I think it’s exercising a muscle that I need in my brain. And then another thing that I learned from one of Nick’s [00:19:00] articles is talked about how emotions come and go and I was like, do they? You could have told me that I’m sure it’s obvious but because I was in a constant state of anxiety I was like emotions don’t come and go I have the anxiety emotion constantly.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah
11. Accept that Emotions Come and Go
Rachel: And then it talked about how when you feel in a situation of anxiety just get in your body do mindfulness again and notice what your body’s feeling and just accept it and then wait and see what happens. And what happens is it dissipates, but it’s different than when you’re trying to stop this right now, stop this right now, stop this right now.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah.
Rachel: So I was like what would happen if I waited and see what happens? And I found that I don’t have to always be anxious.
Emma – Studio Mic: Interesting. Was that like part of dropping the struggle for you? Dropping the struggle against anxiety?
Rachel: I think so. And also just giving me some hope.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah, because it felt like it was always there all the time, 100 percent.
Rachel: Yeah. And it was like, oh, but he teaches that it comes from your thoughts. And you also have to have this, that your emotions, your feelings come from thoughts. So if I keep up a constant stream of [00:20:00] worrying and negative thoughts, then I can easily be anxious constantly.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah.
Rachel: The biggest thing I think that turned me around was just getting hope back. I felt hopeless that I wasn’t ever going to get better, that this couldn’t be cured, that none of these things had worked. I was always going to be miserable and make my family miserable. And then just some of these things gave me a little glimpse of light so that I could be like, oh, that went well. I wonder if that could happen again. And it was very gradual and the nights came on first. So for a long time, people say, how are you doing? And I’d say, I’m doing really good at night. And in the mornings I’m still struggling.
Emma – Studio Mic: Okay.
12. Trust Herself that She Can Handle the Ups and Downs
Rachel: And so it took for a long time I started feeling better. Like I can eat dinner with my family. I could even make dinner, that kind of stuff. That came first, and then as I accustomed myself to a new morning routine, the morning started to feel better. I also wondered, when is this just going to hit me again? When am I going to fall down again? When am I going to feel anxious again? And I feel like I have enough hope and enough skills now that if, when something hard hits me and I [00:21:00] feel like falling back again, I know it doesn’t have to be permanent.
Emma – Studio Mic: That’s cool.
Rachel: Yeah
Emma – Studio Mic: I love it.
13. Let Go and Let God
Rachel: But I also really liked the phrase that you’ve all heard before. Let go and let God. I’m a control freak and had to let some of that go and just see how things play out. And most of the time they play out nicely. That’s the thing. I was running around acting like most things are bad and that’s not true.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah.
Rachel: Most things are good. And so I’ve had more time. I’ve been able to help my aunt and one of my neighbors get to a lot of their doctor appointments and we’re cool and doing some things. That feel really good to me because I’m well enough to help people. And people are still so shocked by it. They’re like, are you sure it’s okay? They always check with me first. How are you feeling? Is it going to be okay to take me to this thing? And I’m like, I’m feeling okay and it’s so great.
14. Describe Instead of Judge Feelings
Emma – Studio Mic: Have you found with the oh, what if I make my kids uncomfortable? What if people notice? What if, have you found that you’ve been able to be gentler with yourself? Because it sounds like you judged yourself a lot when you had feelings, like if you weren’t happy, or if you were feeling anxious, you’d be like, why am I doing this? What’s the matter with me? I need to make this go away, or I need to not be here. Have you gotten [00:22:00] gentler with yourself, or?
Rachel: Yeah, I think accepting the way I feel is I probably was thinking in my head, I’m feeling this way, but it’s wrong.
Emma – Studio Mic: A good person wouldn’t be feeling this way.
Rachel: Yeah, and a better way to think about it is, because I don’t want to say this is right and wonderful and I keep doing this is uncomfortable. This is painful even.
Emma – Studio Mic: This is a more like a descriptive word instead of a judgmental
Rachel: Yeah, not a good or bad because I’ve also learned this from you or Nick, emotions are not meant to be good or bad. They’re just meant to be a reaction to our experiences and our thoughts and we’re supposed to learn how to live with all of them but For me, and for most people, it’s really hard to accept the hard ones.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah, we want them to go away. That’s natural.
Rachel: Yeah. And the weird thing is that if you accept them, then they do go away a little faster.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah, dropping that struggle, right?
Rachel: Not necessarily fast, but a little faster.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah, they don’t tend to hang around as long. Yeah. That’s really cool, Rachel. I’m really proud of you, one, for all the work you’ve done. You’ve tried so much and you’ve worked hard to learn things, [00:23:00] but also to let go. Which is sometimes harder than just doing more. And also just showing up today. That’s like a serious accomplishment. It takes a lot of courage. So I really appreciate you being here and sharing your story.
Rachel: You’re welcome. Thanks for letting me come do it. I do like to talk. So
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah, that’s awesome. Do you have any last bits of advice or words of encouragement for people who are experiencing intense anxiety?
Rachel: I would definitely say don’t give up, and I would also say believe in yourself. I really feel like humans have the innate tendency to be happy and be positive.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yeah
Rachel: But we have to get out of our own way sometimes. So I had this idea that I was a pessimist, so I couldn’t be happy. Actually, once I break that habit of constant pessimistic thinking, I just find natural happiness in the littlest things.
Emma – Studio Mic: That’s cool.
Rachel: I’m just shopping and cooking and eating, but it feels great because I’m not worried about it all the time. So I think we really do have the ability to be positive if we can learn how to break the negative habits.
Emma – Studio Mic: That’s awesome. Cool. Thank you, so much for being here. Really [00:24:00] appreciate it.
Rachel: No problem.
Emma – Studio Mic: Yep. To all of you out there, thanks for being here. Take care.
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